How Cancer Led Us to Becoming IVF Parents (In Vitro Fertilization)
Jacob and I chose to do IVF because it’s the best chance we’ll have at having a healthy kid or two in the far future. We could completely forgo IVF and wait until the surgery and cancer care is alllll over and we’re five years down the road from taking tamoxifen, and then try naturally and see how it goes but that is soooooo risky considering our future age and how much damage the cancer treatment may or may not to do me and my reproductive systems.
The other reason we’re doing IVF now is because one benefit of having cancer and IVF is that you get a fatttttttttt discount on the entire process. While we will be IVF parents, we have had a vastly different experience than the average person or couple who goes through this. And it’s for the better and worse. One of those for the better subjects is the cost. Because we were essentially forced into IVF due to my cancer, our costs won’t be nearly as high and patients who walk in seeking IVF for other reasons. This whole thing is a mess, but this mess, I am incredibly thankful for. IVF is insanely expensive and rarely covered by insurance.
While it will cost us around $15,000 just to get pregnant, that’s FAR, far less than the average IVF patient. While cancer fucking blows, this is something we saw as an incredible blessing to take advantage of.
We’re blessed with these savings and the beauty of science, but am I still frustrated at this whole situation just like any other IVF parent? You fucking bet. For Jacob and I, it will take almost two weeks of shots, a big fat butt shot, multiple blood draws, vaginal ultrasounds, sperm samples, paying to freeze embryos and praying for a successful transfer five years from now and a five figure payment JUSTTTTTT to get pregnant. It pisses me off that so many other people get to go on a date, maybe get a little tipsy with your partner, make your way home, get all hot and bothered, have enjoyable sex in the comfort of your home, buy a $10 pregnancy test from CVS and bam, you’re pregnant and on your way. Must be fucking nice.
Look, I know that’s not how it is for everyone and it’s usually not that simple, but I’m still in my feelings right now. And probably will be for a long time.
By the time you’re hearing this, we will have hopefully have had a successful retrieval and I’m hopefully sitting back, feet kicked up recovering and relaxing.
PROMPT
Next time you’re in a challenging situation, see if you can find just ONE blessing.
Please feel free to share your action item with me in the comments below. It always feels good to write it out!
